The Importance of the Mother/Daughter Relationship
Maybe you get the opportunity to briefly check in with you Mum as you chop the veggies for dinner or whack her on speaker phone as you do school pick up. Perhaps you text on your lunch break during busy days at the office or just before you leave for your weekly class at the gym. Or maybe you and your mother don’t chat much at all these days as life has gotten too hectic or you’ve said some things to each other that have damaged your relationship.
Although mother-daughter relationships are often idealized in our minds, in reality, they are frequently complex and surprisingly complicated. They are also highly varied. There are cultural and generational differences in how mothers and daughters relate to one another as we get older. Every relationship between mum and daughter changes over time, but they also take many different forms.
We all know that there are mother-daughter relationships that can’t be repaired no matter what you do. Yet there are other relationships that may be strained but with the help of a few changes, can become healthy, positive connections between adult daughters and mothers.
Whatever the case, the relationship will benefit if you take time out to relax, explore and connect more deeply with each other. After all, no relationship is as primal as that between mother and daughter.
Lee Sharkey, who teaches in the Faculty of Women’s and Gender Studies at the University of Maine Farmington in the United States, says as females grow our energy is largely often focused on men but the original love relationship is with our mother. “If we as daughters don’t acknowledge that, we’re closing ourselves off from a great source of power and fulfilment and understanding of ourselves,” she says.
Wellness expert Jo Surkitt, herself a mother to two young sons, loves having Mother and Daughter’s on her Revitalise Escapes tours, as she yearned for more dedicated time with her own Mum, Susan and wanted to help other busy daughters and their Mums nurture their relationship. Jo counts herself lucky to enjoy a beautiful relationship with her Mum, especially since gaining a new found respect and understanding of her since having her own children.
Jo and Susan have travelled the world together and supported each other through significant challenges, including losing Jo’s Dad to cancer 15 years ago, illness and heartache.
“But with young children I sometimes find it difficult to get that quality time together, rushing from activities, staccato conversations, never finishing a sentence or hearing a complete conversation,” she said. “I felt I needed some precious time with Mum where we talk about family history, our highs, lows, our passions and our childhoods.”
Jo believes if people have the opportunity to see their mum for Mother’s Day, to find an experience or activity they can do together to share and discover something together as mother and daughter. It’s a great way to deepen the relationship and bond together and learn more about each other as adults.
You may like to bring your own mum or daughter along with you to the Summit, so don't forget to book your tickets here.